Happy Fun Cog

Here in the frigid Northeast, we all have secret lovers. Those lovers are the power company and the gas/oil company. Every fall and winter, these companies screw us come bill time.

One such screwing service that one can voluntarily sign up for is the payment plan, in which the companies figure out your average bill over the course of a year and charge you that amount every month. So instead of paying low(er) amounts in the summer and high in the winter you may a happy/painful medium throughout the year.

You must have an account with the company in question for a year before you can sign up for this service. I just signed up for this and it was a remarkable experience in automation. At no point did I talk to a human. I called the customer service number and went into an automated voicemail system. That system, going by the number I had called from, identified my account without me having to say anything. Then I said "payment plan" and "yes" into the phone and that was the entirety of the experience.

Honestly, it was kind of creepy. I think I'd be happier if the experience dragged out for 10 minutes and involved repeating my information over the phone to a belligerent, half-deaf person who was only capable of typing one word per minute.